this is the story

of my life. my life as it usually is. it is a sad, sad thing. my clumsiness, plus my brother's evilness...it equals disaster.

Anyway, I simply wanted to inform you of how my life has taken a turn for the worse in recent days. On Sunday afternoon, before we ate lunch, I was munching on cucumbers. Simply minding my own business. In fact, I was being obedient! My parents had actually TOLD me to eat those cucumbers! Anyway, these were vinegar-soaked cucumber slices. And being the um..frugal person that I am, I did not feel a need to waste a perfectly clean plate on cucumber slices, and therefore I simply ate them out of the container (which was filled almost to the top with vinegar). As I was contentedly enjoying these cucumbers, my brother, Benjamin, decided that he wanted some. SO HE TRIED TO STEAL ONE!!! As you can imagine, I was not pleased by this outburst. In fact, I was quite DISpleased. Therefore, I tried to protect my precious vegetables. In the process of performing this noble deed, I.........spilled the vinegar all over my lap. IT BURNS REALLY BAD, PEOPLE! Vinegar and skin are not meant to come in contact with one another!!! Plus, this vinegar spilled all over the counter and the floor, as well. For a few moments I simply sat there in shock. But then I felt compelled to clean up this mess. Well, actually, my parents told me to....while they laughed at me. (In a good-natured way. Although Ben, on the other hand, I am sure was laughing at me quite evilly, thinking "HA! my plan worked!"). Anyway, I cleaned up the vinegar and washed my legs off, and returned to my normal routine.

Then, on Sunday evening, after church, I attended an afterglow. At this afterglow, there was food. And this food was meant to be placed on a plate. A styrofoam plate. I chose to consume (or at least, I desired to consume) Skittles, Sour Skittles, M&M's, two cookies, and some Doritos. I placed them on a plate. A styrofoam plate. I ate several Skittles, and possibly a few M&M's. I calmly (well, as calmly as possible at an afterglow) followed my dear friends downstairs and outside. Once we had reached our desired destination (the patio), we (Bri, Laura, and I) stood there and had a lovely conversation (well, actually I don't remember what it was about...but I'm sure it was lovely). Whatever the conversation, at some point, Bri said something worthy of a hi-5, and therefore, being the good friend that I am, I eagerly gave her one! Or at least, I tried to do so. Unfortunately, my plate, a styrofoam plate, got in the way of my hand, and I inadvertantly flung its contents all over my dear friend, Bri. I felt quite embarrassed. Not to mention the fact that I lost all of my food except one cookie that Bri somehow managed to catch. Thank you, Bri, and I am terribly sorry for this mishap.

Saturday, I got our lawnmower stuck in a ditch.

Tonight, I was instructed to carry the leftover soup from tonight's dinner to the downstairs refrigerator. I was in the process of doing so when I noticed Ben's evil smile. I then noticed my iPod sitting next to him. Therefore I calmly told him, "DON'T TOUCH MY IPOD!!!!". At this, his face fell noticeably. Then he decided to torture me by following behind me as I ventured down to the basement. It was quite annoying, the paranoia that he might, at any moment, tickle me as I carried this large pot of soup. But that was the least of my worries. Along the way to the refrigerator, he discovered a dead lizard. He picked it up and teased me about it (although he somehow thought it was a frog...) until I was paranoid that he would shove it in my face. Therefore I ran the rest of the way to the refrigerator. As soon as my back was turned to put the pot of soup in its rightful place, apparently, Ben tossed this lizard onto the top of my head. I did not notice this. As soon as the pot was safely on a shelf, I whipped around to make sure the lizard was still where it should be - in Ben's hand. It was not. Seeing this, and Ben's evil smile and hysterical laughter, I screamed and jumped up and down and shook my head to rid it of this disgusting thing. It fell on the floor, and I was immediately quite angry with my...ahem...dear brother. Therefore I grabbed a 2x4 (except that it wasn't a 2x4 because it was shorter...but I do not know the exact measurements) and chased Ben around the basement and eventually upstairs with it. Then he proceeded to lock himself in his room until I gave up. Later, as he told our mother about this occurance, she told me, "Homicide is not the answer." A wise piece of advice that every human being should heed.

I am sorry if i have bored you with all of these stories. but i simply thought it might be funny to other people who have not had the...ahem...pleasure of experiences such as these. And keep in mind, that this sort of thing happens to me on a regular basis. If you are ever bored, simply ask me if i have had any klutzy or odd experiences, and i will be happy to entertain you for a couple of hours.

well, ipml!! :)

~beth

*cough cough* my throat hurts

really bad!!! well, it feels a little better at the moment b/c i took some ibuprofen (did i spell that right??? hm...) and drank some hot tea with honey...yum! i usually don't like hot tea, but i liked it today!!! lol :) yeah, i like, can't talk! so i'll just get it all out through my fingers ;) haha
anyway, hey, i just dicovered that i can't do use the 'tab' button to make an indention :( sad. oh well, i'm just getting too accustomed to using 'word' haha.
anyway again ;) um...yesterday was jaymee's birthday!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY JAYMEE!!! yeah, i went home with her after church and then went back to church...wait, i'll just give you the layout of my day, i was gone ALL DAY!!!

ok, so we left home to go to church at 9:10 am. we were supposed to leave at nine, but i won't go there ;)
then we went to church which lasted until like, hm....12:sumthin pm. and then mine and jaymee's fams went to moe's for lunch. and then went back to church for our piano recital (wahoo.). and that was finally overwith at like, idk...um...maybe like 3:somethin pm.
then i went home with jaymee and we hung out and did stuff on the computer while mrs. w was getting ready for the afterglo last night.
then we went back to church for the praise gathering. and that ended at like...hm...7:15 or so. and then we went back to jaymee's (accompanied by matt and lizzy and jasmine).
then jaymee's afterglo lasted until 10:00pm. but i didn't get home until like, idk, 11:30 or later! so yeah, it was a very full day! i loooooooooooooove days full of fun with friends!!! hahahaha, that was some good alliteration, huh? haha :) i love socialability (is that a word? if not, it should be.)
well, oh! i just realized that i'm listening to the cheeseburger song from veggietales!!!! AAAAAUGH! why in the world do i have this on my playlist??????? it's sooooo funny, but mr. lunt's voice disturbs me....i'm gonna change it....whew! now i'm listening to 'lost' by red. oh! there is this amazing song that for some reason always makes me want to cry, it's called 'tears of the saints' and it's by leeland. it is sooooooo amazing! also, i just discovered this awesome song by skillet that's called 'hero'. it's really cool :)
anyway, um....hm.....ho hum...haha, that was treebeard talk lol ;) oh! we're having a tipo camping trip in exactly a week!!!! i'm soooooo excited!!! it's gonna be at my house cuz we have our own little 'camp site' haha, daddy made it, it's pretty sweet. ooh, i need to send an email to all the tipos and tell them to bring their swimsuits cuz we're going to the pool! i'll have to do that, wait i should make sure we're still doing it...nevermind! haha, um....oh! i get to have an afterglo at my house sometime in july! i'm soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo excited!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D in case u don't know what an afterglo is, it's like a party that the teens at our church go to after the evening service. we just hang out, eat (of course ;) and play games. it is so totally awesome!!! lol :)
let's see...what else could i talk about? hm.....well, i can't - oh! i just remembered, we finally found a good home for pippin!!! i'm very happy :) it's a family that goes to our church. they're really nice. they have three kids, pippin will get lots of love :) and they decided to keep his name the same!!!! YAY!!!! lol :) ok, what song is this??? strange...i don't recognize it, let me go look...oh, it's called 'your touch' and it's by kutless...ok, i recognize it now :)
anyway, i'd better get off now, bye!!!

~beth